Does Change Have to be Hard?

“IT’S GOOD”… really?

Change is hard, there’s no denying that. Be it big or small, life altering or temporary transitions, moving into an unknown territory is frightening. Even for those who don’t commonly experience anxiety, we’re all creatures of habit and branching out from the norm could definitely trigger a bout of unease in them too. But life lends itself to one certainty, and that is, change is inevitable. So if that’s the case, shouldn’t we be picking out every positive that oozes from said change? I know I know – easier said than done, as are most things. But while we’re here we may as well try!

I’m no exception when it comes to experiencing anxiety when even a hint of change is brought up. That’s not to say that I don’t enjoy a change of scenery when traveling, change in culture, seasons, people – you get the gist. But I’ve always been prone to quickly slipping into the anxiety-stricken lane before actually going through the journey. Though it’s something I am constantly working on and pushing myself to get through. And with life’s guaranteed lineup of changes waiting to welcome me over the years, I am teaching myself to embrace it rather than run from it…

As with everything in life, you always have a choice. One of the biggest lessons I’ve learnt during the first half of 2018 is how powerful the mind is. The way you think plays a huge role in influencing the situations in your life. Positivity breeds positivity, as does negativity breed negativity. So one of the first things to be aware of is your thoughts. This became so clear to me when I was feeling so stressed with work and university. (let’s be clear: I stress easily and heavily, but most of the time I have reason to!) The realisation came in the middle of all this chaos when I said to myself, “it’s going to be okay, I am going to get through this, I will succeed, but it’s not going to be the end of the world if I don’t”. Changing my thoughts to a more positive outlook on my situation helped me get through evening drives home from work, in tears of overwhelm! I’ve always appreciated that the mind is crazy powerful, but I’d never really utilized it until now. When you confidently reassure yourself that you’ve got this, literal relief fills your body (that’s what I feel)…

It’s good to be strict with yourself because otherwise you won’t grow, but it’s also important to accept that you’re not a superhero and sometimes you have to realise you can’t always have it together. That’s the thing about change, it can be hugely exciting, but there can be moments of doubt too. It’s not the end of the world if you want to sit with that feeling for a bit, instead of masking it with an ‘everything is just dandy’ facade. Your mind doesn’t always have to be in charge; your heart can too. It’s the balance between the two that really do get you to the other side. I know for myself, my emotions can get in the way so quickly (you know when you’re so angry but you end up crying, and you’re just like ‘hello!? I’m angry! why are you crying!’) but because of my emotions, I am also able to appreciate knowing where I stand in the changing situation. Being okay with what you feel and allowing yourself to feel it is so important! Especially if you’re prone to the anxiety lane like I am – we gotta be prepared.

Change doesn’t need to be hard. But a lot of the time it is. You know the feeling? Uncertainty isn’t fun. But, change brings with it so many amazing opportunities that have to be considered as well. Basically the positives that I was speaking about above – yup, they’re in the form of experiences, opportunities and growth. If things always stayed the same, the world would literally not be able to run. Ideas wouldn’t boom, culture wouldn’t grow, inspiration would be stationary, colours would be bland… change is what gives life it’s exhilarating twist! I know that it’s tough to remember this when faced with something that could potentially change your entire life, but as I sit back and type this out, it makes so much sense. And I’m only saying that because I really do believe it – you’re reading the words of someone who has been anxious her entire life. So if my mind can ease myself into a state of calm, so can yours. Change doesn’t have to be hard. And even if it is, it doesn’t mean it won’t be beautiful.

How do you deal with change? Let me know what your tips for reduced anxiety are when it comes to it!